Are you Stuck in Life? Can you be Ok With not knowing?

Can you Be Ok with not knowing? Are you stuck in life? Is life passing you by? Has something put you on hold or has you not moving in a direction or fully going for it and going after your dreams with Gusto? Well, this is the #1 thing that stops most people and the fix is super easy! One of the Biggest learnings I have ever learned from a Healer is being ok with not knowing? I have been working with a few people recently and it just dawned on me how many people hold themselves back simply because they don't know what the result is going to be... I mean highly intelligent, well meaning, good people who have very Powerful, Passionate dreams simply hesitate, wait and hold back for 1 single and 1 simple reason, they simply don't know what is going to happen or what the end results will be... So then they wait and wait and wait and re-think it over and over and over hoping to know for sure or be perfect! Now you all know I specialize in Communication between men and women and dating/relationship coaching helping men and women finally truly understand each other and our deeply held needs and desires. And I am also a Highly Trained Personal Development and Success coach. Now, being a competitive fighter and athlete since I was a child, I never really had this problem until after I was 28... but then again it does seem to happen to most people in their mid to late 20's... As an athlete, all I was surrounded by were people doing everything in their power, totally going for it without a second thought.... And that's the way it's supposed to be. And all the coaching I was doing was with Professional Fighters & Athletes totally going for it cuz there's no other way... Pure Adrenaline Junky!!! But then I got knocked on my ass in a way that I couldn't have ever imagined... Death after Death, loss after Loss! Everyone I knew, loved and cared for died... Not 1 single survivor... then the very people I thought Loved me & would be there for me were the ones who actually went in for the kill at my very lowest point in life... Trust me, I Know betrayal, I know real loss, I know real, real hurt... I can also tell you that it taught me the Greatest lessons life has ever taught... I found Myself (Literally) and My Power within! Life has changed. It was through the pain and suffering and taking baby steps, moving forward with determination no matter how badly life hit me!  So, I am keenly aware of the Biggest Block Buster to stopping you from succeeding and living the life of your dreams! NOT KNOWING!!!  So you got hurt! Life Kicked your ass and knocked the living shit out of you, again!!! And you fell down one to many times from too far up and it really hurt... it damaged you badly!!! Trust me, I know... I know... I also know that you can get back up, stronger, smarter and more able than ever before... because you were supposed to get your ass kicked in the meanest, cruelest most hurtful way possible... why? Because you were chosen! You were chosen to face your Greatest, most terrifying most debilitating battles of life!!! You were chosen to find yourself! Because that's what this is all about! And that's th every way you find your Inner Strength and your inner power! And by facing your fears, pain and suffering and getting back up again and again and again, this is how you find out who you are within, yourself! And I mean the real you inside!! You were chosen to learn and grow and develop beyond your wildest dreams beyond cruelty you never knew even existed.... Because you were meant to fly!!! Because the other side of all this pain and suffering is a Beauty, a Strength you can't even Imagine! I know, because I made it! Jesus, Buddha, God, Tony Robbins, all these great teachers were right, there is something they are trying to get you to understand and so is life! So you might as well get back up and go back at it, because one way or another you are going to learn what this Power, Strength and this Amazing thing called Self truly is! See, you simply can not have a clue of who you truly are or what your power truly is by sitting on the sidelines doing nothing! You can't.... it's not physically possible or mentally possible! You have to step into the ring and get your ass kicked again and again and again... But I promise you this, That is how you find yourself. That is how you become stronger and stronger and smarter and better at life! This is how you find your real, true self. So keep going! Just keep going!!! Do not live a cowardly life. It will eat you to death, literally! You were meant to live this life and enjoy it to the best as you can. So take courses, buy books, go to seminars and hire a really really good coach on personal development, communication, psychology, human behavior, confidence, meditate, pray hard just keep learning growing and developing because it's worth it! And it will only make life better and better and better and better until one day you will see the Sun Rise in your minds eye and like the Beautiful, Golden Glistening Sun from the heavens warms up the morning dew on the grass, you will Step Into your Power and live your Life Being Yourself! And you can't even begin to fly until you have found your True Self and that self is deep, deep within... And that is exactly what all of my teachings and courses are about... Once you find your true self, you will then find and reconnect with your True Power! And Trust me, it's Absolutely Awesome, Life Shifting and Life Altering! You will discover learnings, understandings and Power inside you that you never even knew existed... So it hurts and you are afraid to turn that corner! You are stuck because... "You Don't Know!" And you are waiting for everything to be perfect, exactly right and know exactly what to do because you already know exactly what's going to happen, right? Wrong!! See, it's not about being perfect! This is the wrong answer period!!! It's never and I mean never been about being perfect! You want to know what it sincerely was meant to be about? It's always and I mean always meant to be about "BEING AWESOME!!!" And perfection is not Awesomeness!!! Perfections is a very limited, small mind set of not being  brave of not taking courage! Perfection is literally a tiny, very small, pin point focus with your eyes and mind, literally!!! Now Awesomeness is the complete opposite of this! Being Awesome is opening up, not closing down! Awesomeness is literally opening up to a much larger vision, yes with your eyes! Awesomeness is opening up to the larger picture and being able to step inside and see the larger picture! Now that's literally what it means to be Awesome!! For now, take this and use this and ponder this because holding back, waiting or perfection is nothing more than a stuck mental state. Well, I have the answer to fix this problem and I mean Kick it's ASS & Demolish it forever!!! And put you back on track and get you back into the skies able to fly again! I'm serious... This literally changed my entire life! First though... This one simple Secret, Understanding, Way of Looking at Life and shifting your perspective will change everything and release the Brakes and let you begin to fly again... and, it's fun and easy... Now let's look at this for a moment... #1 Do you even realize that this is the real problem from you going for it and living your dreams? Stop! I mean it! Stop for one moment right now! And think... How many times have you complained and blamed and or went to therapy or to a coach to figure out how to find success or happiness or the man or woman of your dreams or whatever? How many supposed issues did you talk about or go over and over with different friends, coaches or therapist? Did you ever once stop to think, Hey, maybe all of these other issues are merely symptoms created from one thing, the "I don't Know for sure what's going to happen?" And I'm not going to budge until I do? See, I know because I went to all kinds of therapist and success coaches and one day an energy healer who finally changed my life looked me in the eye and said, "Can you be ok with not knowing?" And I remember wanting to say, "No!" But I couldn't. Hahaha... I really really wanted to... I even looked at her with this very temporary frustration and it just melted, because for some reason, that damn question just melts the damn problem away... I mean, I never once thought about it like this. It completely shifted my perspective on my problems and fears. And you know what it did...? It released me forever. You know what it really did unconsciously each time I did it? It opened up my eyes & mind to a wider/bigger view of things... and I began to see the bigger picture and more options! And suddenly it was not only ok to not know, it was even better. Suddenly life turned back on. I began to see the Challenges of life as fun and exciting again! See, a lot of people can't understand why I am so happy almost all the time even in the face of things not going my way at all... I am absolutely Ok to not knowing what's going to happen or how I am going to get through... She literally had me write that question down on a 3X5 card and carry it around in my back pocket. And ever time I got mad, scared and simply stuck on any issue, I would pull it out... and each and every time, like magic, it just melted whatever problem I had... and my mind began to open up... it's the most incredible question I have ever asked myself... It just made/makes things easier... This one question is Life Changing!!! "Can I Be Ok with not knowing?" It's ok, it really is ok!!! See, "Life was not meant to be known..." I've heard this before many, many times but it never really sunk in "UNTIL" I began to apply this 1 question... and what I mean is: I have heard so many times from Tony Robbins and other coaches and seminars and speakers and books and home study tapes and audio and even in movies... But not until I did this one thing, ask myself, "Can I be Ok with not Knowing?", over and over and over did I finally understand what this really means... How many times have you heard, "Life was not meant to be known but to be experienced" or "you were not meant to know the end because then you would miss the journey or it wouldn't' be fun if you knew already in advance what the ending was going to be!!!" Or something like this? You've heard it, I've heard it, but the Power that this has once you finally open up to it will change your entire life! It will change your attitude! It will change the way you view and perceive the  world and shift everything... Think about it for 1 second. What would happen if you were watching a movie and you already knew every scene and every ending of every movie? You would be bored silly! You simply would not be as excited the first time watching that movie if you knew! It takes a lot of the fun out of it! And it's the same in life!!! It's the Not Knowing that makes your life Amazing and Awesome!! Now Please, Please DO NOT take this lightly!!! What I am saying is life changing but only if you truly Step into it and live it simply by doing one simple thing... write this question down on a 3X5 Card and carry it around with you. Make another one and put it in your car, purse and put it on the wall where you live and at work... "Can I Be Ok With Not Knowing?" And each and every time you come across not knowing something and get mad or angry or scared or whatever, pull this card out and ask yourself, "Can I be ok with not knowing?" And watch what happens... I promise you, your life will slowly begin to shift and your perspective will begin to change more and more and more and suddenly you will begin to see the Awesomeness, the Glory, The Power life has to offer you simply by being ok with not knowing and taking the jump anyways!!! And now you are Alive and on Fire Living your life! Not simply sitting on the sidelines of life an watching or listening or talking about others living their life! Now you have stepped back into the Game of Life! Remember, start where you are right now! 1 Step at a time is absolutely ok! One of the most interesting things about single men is the fact that single men are more afraid of approaching and opening a conversation with a female than anything else on the planet! And this is an absolute fact. I have had clients who were Competitive/Professional fighters in Kickboxing and Mixed Martial arts, Special Forces, Jet Fighter Pilots,who actually fought in both the Iraq and Afghanistan wars who were more afraid of approaching a girl then flying a Million dollar Fighter Jet into Live combat or Jumping out of a plane while being shot at!!! Isn't that insane? So don't feel so bad... Because we all go through it. Do you want to know why and or what is causing this inside of us? And see below as to why such Brave men who would fly into combat risking their lives, stepping into the kickboxing / mma ring against highly trained professional fighters and martial artists are 10 times more afraid of approaching a smaller, feminine girl... And why you are or may be afraid to live your dreams and go for it! #2 Caveman protection... Mother Nature one way or another hard wired into us a very strong protection system that is literally hard wired into our DNA! And what that protection system is, is to be absolutely terrified of going around that Unknown corner or bend or into that valley before you know everything there is to know and absolutely know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you will be safe! Because back in the Caveman days, if a Caveman or Cavewomen didn't know what was down that path or around that corner, it could be a ferocious Beast that could kill them and eat them for dinner or lunch, depending on what time of day or night it is... Now the absolute contrary problem is, the Caveman or woman could never absolutely know what was around the corner or if it was absolutely safe or not! And that's what makes life so damn exciting!!! You have no clue of whether or not you will die when you... hahaha... ok, ok... The Good News is, You don't have to worry about Ferocious Saber Tooth Tigers or Wooly Mammoths and animals like that... In fact, the fears we are talking about have absolutely nothing to do with facing wild animals or being killed. Now here is the really good thing/news. Your DNA / Nervous system made a mistake! Yep, that's right! This Protection system was designed to protect you from life or death situations. But sometimes it gets mixed up with every day living like going to college or taking a class or speaking engagements or starting a business or being a professional athlete or going after a dream! And it even kicks in when a big tough guy approaches a feminine girl... hahaha... it's not real! But it makes life exciting! But it only makes it exciting when you walk through the fear anyways.,.. I mean ask yourself, "Can I be ok with not knowing?" Then do it anyways... and find out, because that's what this life really is about... it's about discovering our journey and living in the experience of our life and life's journey unfolding as we walk into the movie of life! This is what living is all about!!! So simply ask this question and start living your life! Can I be ok with not knowing? The answer will always be yes, because unless you are risking death, it's ok!!! And once your conscious mind knows it, then suddenly you automatically relax... it was one of the most powerful therapeutic techniques I ever learned... it absolutely changed/shifted my perspective each and every time and I was off to the races... What are you waiting for? What would happen if you could? #3 Let's see what happens!  One of the biggest presuppositions I live by and learned from NLP training is, "Let's see what happens!" It means to open back up and be ok with not absolutely knowing exactly what is going to happen before you do it! I mean how in the hell can you possibly know before you ever take a step? You simply can't... And, it changes from being right or wrong and letting go of the fear of being wrong to taking on a more experimental view of things like a mad scientist, like an absolutely committed and focused professional athlete, like anyone who has ever had a a dream and wanted to know what would happen simply by taking that step and seeing what happens! So from now on, start asking yourself, "Can I be ok with not knowing?" And take on the mind set of "Let's see what happens!" And your entire life will change! #4 "Let's see how far we/I can go."  Now this is also one of my favorite attitudes and mind sets! It's not about can I be a world champion or can I be a $Billionaire or can I be the absolute best in the world. It's about, "Let's see how far I can go!" Because this attitude & mindset is the way to achieve your highest success! Perfection will only kill it! You need to open up to your Awesome Power to Achieve your highest goals in life! Including being happy!   ** These 3 mind sets will open the door, take your foot off the break and melt away all the pressure and replace it with a Looser, more enjoyable, Fun and exciting Curiosity and fascination for life once again! Now that's how you become a World Champion! That's how you succeed in life, love, business, music, sports and science!   #1 "Can I Be Ok With Not Knowing?" #2 Let's see what happens! #3 "Let's see how far we/I can go."   Be ok with not knowing and finding out what happens because that is what this entire journey is all about... it's an amazing and Awesome Journey once you step back into the drivers seat and begin to drive...  Can I be ok with no knowing? Yes, Yes I can... the answer is always yes! So stand up, kick ass and literally get the most out of life! Because that's why you are here! Life was meant to be enjoyed! Remember, "Not knowing is what makes life Exciting!" To David and my 2 friends at Starbucks in Target! This one is for you guys! Good luck and have fun! Mike Kollin
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